As my second son was born, he reminded me of what it truly means to be a father.

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Danielle MacInnes

My son took me by surprise. I thought I knew everything by now, he was second after all, but first look into his eyes changed everything in an instant.

It was like gazing into infinity.

Here I was again, looking at the world through the eyes of a newborn, in an absolute awe and with an absolute love.

I remember now, that to be a father means to have a heart beating in someone else’s chest.

To be a father means to love so much that it hurts.

To be a father means to live your life, as if you are in a constant spotlight – and the audience are those who you love the most.

To be a father means to willingly step down from a main role in life’s journey, handle it to your children.

To be father means to carry a sweet yoke for the rest of your life – as you will never cease to care for your children.

To be father means to have black coffee and white nights.

To be a father means, letting your children fall and guide them to learn from their mistakes, because as much as it hurts watching their knees get bruised, you know you it is the only way to get them ready for what’s up ahead.

Because to be a father, means also realisation that you raise your children not for yourself but for the world.

After all, nothing sums better the essence of parenthood as the poem of Kahlil Gibran.

These words ring in my soul, over an over as I stroke my son’s forehead and I dive deep into the depth of his eyes;

On Children
 Kahlil Gibran

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer’s hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.

Becoming mature

I was always wondering…
When is it that we guys become truly mature?
When is it that a boy becomes a man?
The border moves, for sure. We are pushing it forward towards new milestones that we set up subconsciously in our minds. This elusive steps that define maturity keep moving.
Taking responsibility for something – check.
Getting first job – check.
Settling down on your own – check.
Getting married – check.
Becoming parent – stop.
That would be it. Final frontier.
The greatest adventure ever.
Fatherhood, as a journey in which we willingly step down to give a place of a main hero to someone else.
Biggest step to full maturity.
Why?
Because that’s the one, which teaches us most about the humility.
In the end: what makes us truly mature are the events that make us truly humble.

The Epic Quest called Life

So here we are.
Guys, Boyfriends, Husbands, Fathers, Weekend Warriors.

Probably a very last generation of those who used to run in childhood with sticks fighting trolls in a courtyard, who organised water balloon battles against those stinkers from the neighbouring block , who wrestled in sand, got their knees bruised while climbing trees.
We were the last ones to avoid, the omnipresent stigma of virtual reality. And our heads were filled with dreams.
Big, epic dreams.

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Joshua Earle

You can become anyone you want to, we were told. Rock star, general, football player. Fucking astronaut.

Just go ahead and believe that. Its is in our guys, warriors DNA, after all.  To reach for the heights, to climb the highest peak (and then drop your pants down and pee from the top).

When I was a kid I wanted to be a pirate. Or world famous writer.

I have always pictured myself rolling through life accompanied by an elevating soundtrack like in oscar winning movie, carrying a bloodstained armor, waving to crowds of fans with my left hand and giving autographs with the other, flying into space, preventing alien invasion, shitting with epicness.
And here I am, staring eleven hours per day at the numbers on the screen, rolled into the wheels of humongous corporate machine, changing diapers by night, dreading the invasion of bills by the end of the month.

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Ben White

I am Husband, Father, Breadwinner. Manager. Weekend Warrior.

And sometimes I find it hard to distinguish myself from a zombie. Does it have to be, that dream of greatness come back now only while playing another Witcher game on my PC?

Fuck that.

It is time to realise, that we are not ever to drop our childhood dreams, but transcend with them. That we shouldn’t treat life as the ultimate excuse for not living up to our greatest ambitions. A key to success is to pursue passions in spare time, while cherishing every moment of our daily struggles.

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Aziz Acharki

And remember you Fathers – having a family to care for is not only source of strength to face life adventures, but it’s an adventure itself.

I am a father and I am a warrior.

And I am living my quest in my daily experiences.

In my journeys, adventures, battles in the arena of everyday life. In stories told through the eyes of someone who despite coming of age, still lives his childhood dreams. Dreams of fighting trolls, climbing skyscrapers, reaching the heights of heights.
If you ever felt, that life is more, than a repetitive cycle of daily responsibilities, I am sure you will find yourself in some of my stories, if not all of them.
So, hey!… Join me on the epic quest called life.

 

/Post from my archived blog “Sword in the woods”/